Help please
I am so depressed. I dont know what to do. Honestly I have never been what I call depressed. There has never been anything I couldnt drag myself out of….until now. I tried spending some time with hubby this weekend since I was off for 3 days. It made things worse. He just wanted me to play babysitter to his 3 yr old niece. I love her,dont get me wrong, its not her. I tried talking to him. He couldnt say anything nice to me or the kids while they were around. All he could do is say how he wants a military style house (he was never in the military) and how me & the kids dont make the house perfect. *sighs* I have done everything I know how to do besides allowing myself to be a doormat,which I think I have at times already…..what now?
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(((((((TIFFANY)))))))))) I’m battling depression myself at the moment. The blog is a great way to seek support. Had you not written, I would not know you are going through this. So thank you for posting today.
He’s going through a lot himself and like most men, they don’t like to talk about their feelings. I think wanting the house clean and you guys perfect is a cover up you know, easier to complain about the house and kids when what truly bothers him isn’t being addressed.
Can you guys take an evening off from everyone and have dinner - just the two of you and talk?
I think during these hard times, as I’m going through it too with my income, it’s important we communiate with our partner and keep each other feeling secure in a very unsecure situation.
LOVE YOU!
Tiffany I wish I knew what to say. Depression is so hard is the source your husband…sounds that way. Would talking to him and telling how he makes you feel ease anything you are feeling right now? I would not keep anything inside I would lay it on the line and tell him what you are feeling talking is the only real way to get to the heart of the issues. HUGS!!
(((HUGS TIFFANY)))
I wish I had great wisdom to give you. I have been there myself. It is frustrating and lonely. Let him know how you feel. Also explain to him that you are not a mind reader and can’t guess at what he is thinking and he needs to share his feelings with you. Always here if you need a shoulder.
Sweetie, I just dont know what to tell you. I dont know your hubby so I dont know what his problem is. But, I will tell ya that a “military” house–why bother–there are more important things to do with your time. Clean house, yes of course. I just wonder though if the house is even whats bothering him.
I know your under a lot of stress and this sure isnt helping.
Really, my only suggestion is to find something that helps you. Talking to a preacher if you are a church goer - some time just for you to do something you enjoy…just something you can hold on to right now.
Anything I can do, send me a message ok. You know i’m here all the time and i’ll be glad to listen.
Hugs.
Im sorry to hear that hon. Talking it over with him or a friend is the thing that would help me if I were in your place. cooping things up will only make things worse. I hope you find a way to deal with it hon. (((((((((hugs))))))))))))
I think you guys need to talk, something is bothering him and it’s making it seem like it’s the house but that cannot be it.
Husbands can be hard sometimes but you find a way…
Hugs girl. I think what Nancy said is perfect.
OH, Tiffany. Sorry that i haven’t been here when you needed me, but I am here now. Hang in there. I honestly have no wise words to give you or a make it all better commment. All I can tell you is that I am here for you.
Girl I wish I could give you some good Advice, but my marriage is a wreck as well, I do think what the others are saying about time alone is a good starting point , I hope everything works out Have a great week
Im so sorry, Tiffany…I think with your husband being depressed himself lately he probably doesn’t realize that he is taking it out on you and he’s not apreciating everything that you are doing to keep it together! I think that you are doing the best you can and you have to TRY not to take the things that he says personally.