Ariel is still hanging in there. She is quite miserable but still happy because her fiancee is coming back on the 21st! He is hoping she has the baby before he has to go to Kentucky. He & I had a long talk on the phone last night. We are going to be good friends as mother in law & son in law. He really is a sweet guy. His mother..ehh I could live without ever speaking to her.

Sabian is doing well. She has a problem with one girl that won’t leave her alone but I talked to the counselor and so did she. Her grades are really good. She said even though she is in Pre-Ap now, some of the classes are still really easy. So all is well there.

have a great day all

So far its been a good weekend. Friday evening, I went over to my mom’s. My stepdad explained things to us a bit more. The doctors did not give him long..he wouldn’t tell us how long, just said it wasn’t good. But amazingly he is in excellent spirits. He said that he feels alot different about life. He wants us to just enjoy everyday…have fun..no negativity..no sadness. I tried not to cry,but my youngest started & I followed right along. But he believes in miracles….he said he doesnt feel like God is going to bring him home…but either way is a win for him. By the end of our talk, we had him laughing again. Thats all I want..is for him to be happy…no matter how long he is with us.

Saturday night,Ariel & I went to dinner with my parents. Sabian’s best friends birthday party was from 6pm-9pm and she was torn about which thing to do,but I told her to live her life and enjoy the party. We had so much fun just having dinner. My mom & stepdad are getting along like they never have before. We talked about all my issues at home. Something my stepdad said really hit him..”life is so short. You dont have to stay in a place that brings you nothing but misery.Live your life happily while you can.” It made me think about everything I have been thru in the last 15 years. The happy moments have been so few & far between that the memories are seriously faded. So I am making some changes in my life. No one knows how long they have to live. I want whats left of my life to mean something and be as happy as it can be.

HIP HOP ABS..omg…its harder than I thought. lol I love to dance,but he just takes it to a whole new level. I was sweating like a pig when it was finished. Its only 30 minutes long,but right at about 27 minutes I thought I was going to have to stop. But Sabian pushed me to keep going & I did. I finished!! The set of DVDs I bought comes with the complete workout system. It has a workout schedule so you know which workouts to do for the next month. Very nice! And it doesnt hurt that the instructor is HOT! lol So today when I get off work, I am right back at it..shaking my bootay!

 AND when my mom took Ariel to the doctor last week, he told her she has about 2-3 weeks before Isabella comes! YEAHHHH! I promise I will show lots & lots of pics of her.

Well I guess thats it for now…have a great Sunday!

Then my daughter calls….says she thinks her water is leaking. I’m at work so I call my mom and she agrees to take her to her OB. Everything was fine…still dilated to less than 1cm. So thats good. Mom bought her something to eat and took her back home.

Yesterday my mom tells me she & my stepdad are going to stay together…more good news BUT then tells me that my stepdad is sick. I ask her if it is serious..she says yes but doesnt want to talk about it over the phone. Today she tells me my stepdad has an inoperable brain stem tumor. OMG…while I was on the phone with my mom I could feel the lump coming up in my throat & the tears burning my eyes but i didnt cry until I hung up…….it was about that time my daughter called to ask me something. I didnt tell her why I was crying..just that we would talk about it later. 2 minutes later my mom calls back wanting to know why I upset my daughter..OH COME ON MOM…Sam has been my stepdad for 16 years…not to mention the fact that he has been my friend. She says dont cry..be strong…I am a strong person but you just dropped a bomb on me.  I love my stepdad and I will keep a stiff upper lip for his sake & in front on the family BUT I am upset..I can cry when I want.

So I dont know…its one of those days you wish you could rewrite…

Not much is going on around my house..my daughter has lost her mucus plug so its just a matter of time before we have Isabella in the world melting everyone’s hearts. I am so ready to be a grandma!

The man is trying to stop drinking,so I am just hanging in to see what happens. He has been really strange for days but not overbearing…just bordering on annoying.

Work is going ok…still havent found out about the new job just yet…we have 2 people out this week. So I assume with all that going on, they can’t afford for me not to be at work.

Everything is good in Sabian’s little teenager world. I even let her spend the night at a friends’ house on a school night last night. SHOCK! She went to see the Michael Jackson movies This Is It…she said it was awesome!

I think I have been around to everyone’s pages already today, so if you blogged since then, I may have time to get back around. We’ll see…HAVE AN AWESOME AFTERNOON/EVENING/NIGHT!

Anyone else tried it???

I am working all weekend. Not doing anything for Halloween. I think my youngest is going to the movies and then to a few places with some of her friends. The oldest will chill at home with me. There’s not much going on at my house. I have attempted to get along with you know who…..he cant make up his mind what he is doing..saying..etc…

Everything with me is just kinda up in the air. I may be changing jobs within the company. They are looking at moving me back into coding,but the catch is I will be coding for 2 hospitals. They will of course raise my pay & pay me .55 cents a mile. Its worth it. I am just waiting to find out on Monday.

Both of the girls are doing well. Ariel has to stay off her feet for the most part now to keep her ankles & feet from swelling. I told her yesterday,”isnt being pregnant fun?” LOL

Sabian is now in all Pre-AP classes. AP is advanced placement. They have this in junior high to get you ready for AP classes in high school. She was so excited when she found out!

As far as weight loss goes, I lost 1 lb this week. I honestly think I blew it yesterday. I had a good week…great with exericse & eating. Then yesterday it was like someone pressed my I’M SO HUNGRY button. I ate candy with my co-worker….I had M&Ms last night….I had homemade taco salad…no sour cream, but we make it with Doritos and lots of cheese…then at lunch I had fries. it was just a bad day. I didnt get to exercise last night. I got in bed late. SO today I am starting it off much better. I made sure I packed only healthy snacks and lots of water. I ordered a salad with grilled chicken for lunch. I cant let one day get me down because it will turn into 2 days…3…4..5.. Gotta keep going!!!

I hope everyone has a safe & happy Halloween. I’m off to read some bloggies.

I am still having issues with the man. I dont think it can be helped. We agreed to get a divorce and he would move out because he makes wayyyy more money than me. He changed his mind..he would rather me move out. Fine..whatever. So last night he harrassed me every second I was awake pretty much. I tried to jump on the trusty treadmill..who comes outside…yep he did. Ok first of all its not like I dont spend alot of time on the treadmill as it is…..BUT he picks last night to run me into the ground. He taunts me saying..”you better run more cause your next man will want you to have a nice round a$$”……then I say please please leave me alone I need to lose weight. To which he answers…”oh hey what type of man are you looking for?”   I had enough…I got a whole 30 minutes on the treadmill..most of that before he realized I wasnt sitting in the house. *sighs* wow this is what he has resorted to. I tried saying THIS DOES NOT MAKE ME LIKE YOU! He ignored me. I slept on the couch..again.

On a good note…my daughter’s baby shower went very well. She got lots of stuff and we are still trying to find a place to put it all. lol I took her to meet her future mother in law after the shower. Her car is in the shop and she couldnt find a ride. She is very nice. I like her. She crocheted some stuff for the baby and brought back all the stuff my daughter’s fiancee bought. (she recently visited him at the Army base in Georgia) Everything they made or bought was pink & camo. lol

My youngest is doing great! But ready to move away from her dad….so sad….

She will be the lead in her school play about drugs this week. They have what they call red ribbon week. Its dedicated to educating kids about the dangers of drugs & alcohol. She has her lines down perfectly and the part really fits her personality.

I didnt lose anything this past week but I did maintain.

I guess thats about it. ) I hope everyone has a wonderful Monday!

Isnt she cute?!

I went to the doctor and he suggested I try some OTC Zantac or Pepcid before he puts me on anything. He did however give me a prescription for Xanax. He gave me the lowest dose they make. I haven’t taken any yet. Just been toughing it out. I tried talking to hubby last night & the night before about my emotional eating & my ulcers. He acted like this was the first time I mentioned it. (oh & he says he isnt moving now) I dont think he understood. I have never been overweight in my life…until I married him and all the crap started. Even with my thyroid issues I managed to keep it in check. He yelled at me & said I was avoiding him because I went to the treadmill instead of eating. I usually try to get on the treadmill way before he gets home. He expects me to shower with him..go to bed when he does…sit with him the whole time he is home yet he wants his lunch made & his tea containers filled. I dont know what to do with him. I love him but I am tired. Tired of him drinking every single day. The more he drinks, the more of an a** he becomes. I cannot tell you how many times I have had to drag his body into the house or how many times he fell asleep outside. He hasn’t done those things recently but it sticks in my mind…ya know waiting for the next time. He is rude to my oldest….always bringing up things she has done..teenager things..but wont let it go.

Sorry I’m rambling but this is what I deal with everyday……..

My husband & I have decided not to stay together. Its impossible to get along for even a minute at my house. He will be the one leaving and as he says, “I’m just looking for which direction I am going.” We have had problems the entire time we have been married. Its a long story but lets just say he married me for convenience not for love. He didnt decide he actually gave a sh*t until 5-6 years after we got married. I wish I would’ve known 15 years ago. So right now I am sleeping on one of the couches and let him have the bedroom.

I had to take Ariel to the emergency room 2 nights ago. She had told me earlier in the day that her stomach was hurting,but thats just one of those things I thought. By the time I got home at 730, she was crying. she said it was just getting worse & worse,so I took her in. She is doing ok…was dehydrated. The pain she is feeling is because the baby has already dropped into her pelvis and is riding low for only being 31 weeks. She isnt sleeping because of the pain. And all I can do is give her Tylenol and she can take warm baths.

Sabian is great! she went to homecoming with her friends and a boy. Her friend Amanda’s mom made a mum for her. Then she gets to the dance and the boy had brought her one too. She is the one in the middle.

I am going to the doctor tomorrow for my thyroid checkup and I am going to talk to him about all my stress/depression too. I am hoping it will pass on its own. I dont need yet another pill.